Do things Happen To Us or For Us?
What is your response when bad things happen in your life? Are you quick to judge it as “unfair” or “unfortunat.e” or are you more apt to turn it into a (self) teachable moment?
I have noticed that we could stand a great deal to learn from seeing things that happen in our world as for our benefit rather than feel a victimized by it.
I can recall something I read once, that “there are no victims, only volunteers.” That had some effect on me, because at the time, I needed to understand that. I too, fell into a trap of feeling sorry for myself -upset at the misfortune I was feeling.
But I have a different view now. I prefer to consider what there is to learn from each unhappy moment in my life. When I ask myself, how did this happen for me? what is this circumstance saying to me, how might I learn from this so as to avoid a second visit of this unhappiness?, I gain a sense of empowerment and control over changing it in the future. Maybe for all time-hopefully for all time.
It is truly amazing when you turn the teaching moment into how you brought this to yourself in a kind attempt to get a message to you that you needed. I said kind– that’s important. This is not meant to dole out harsh self -criticism or to beat yourself up. You begin to thank the moment rather than to hate it or become negatively affected by it with sadness, depression or a sense of victimization. It’s a lighter load, right? !
My hope is for as many of us as possible to get this one point, as it will free us from feeling at the effect of what happens, the consequence of which has to do with feeling victimized, unhappy and lost.